baseball!

JT,

this is your 3rd year in organized baseball.  we started with t-ball, went to coach pitch and this year is your first year in kid-pitch baseball.  and what a pitcher you are!!!  you are amazing.  i get a thrill every time i see you on the field - on the pitcher's mound or not.  even when you are just standing in the infield, i am so proud to be your mom.  your grandfather loves baseball.  i think he's always wanted to play.  your uncle mike also loved baseball as a child.  our parents could not take him to practices or keep up with the demands and commitments of little league so he had to quit after one season.  feeling their frustrations and desires of playing baseball, i secretly always hoped you would play baseball.  and you were a natural from the start. i think i've showed you the video of you at 2 years old, throwing a ball perfectly into this small netted target.  you started this season a little bit unsure.  unsure how you would stack up against others.  you were the first pitcher in the first game.  you threw.  i held my breath.  that inning was the longest i've sat through. in my head, i felt it was a bit of a shaky start. then i started watching other kids pitch and realized how well you did.  i guess i was comparing you to the major league pitchers :P hahaha 

when i see you on the pitcher's mound at our little league diamond, i feel so anxious for you because it looks so isolated over there.  it's you. everyone staring at you and i imagine a lot of pressure.  i asked you about this on the car ride home once. i asked if you felt all alone up there.  you said to me, "i tune everything out, mom.  i don't see the batter. i don't hear people yelling.  i see the plate and the catcher and i'm just playing catch.  i want to get it over the plate."  you are 7.5 years old. my zen master.  i told you that even adults try to get to that place where they can tune everyone out and focus and here you are, practicing it every single game.  other kids accidentally hit the batter and get all flustered and defeated. many can't continue for more than one more pitch or so.  you?  you've maybe hit one kid.  when i asked if you felt bad (because you are such a sensitive kid), you said, "no.  it's baseball. it can happen. i didn't do it on purpose".  man, i don't know what goes on in that head of yours but it truly amazes me sometimes.

on our mother-son walk this weekend, i asked you if you liked baseball because you were so good at it or if you were good at baseball because you like it so much and put the effort in. you said to me, "isn't that the same thing?"  regardless of what it is, i am so proud of you. whether you play one more year and call it quits or make it all the way to MLB, you have given me such joy these past few years - watching you grow and thrive on the field.  you've even brought your dad out of his shell a little, having him more involved with the team.  you've changed us through just playing baseball and being YOU.

go colorado rockies!!!!!!